Thursday, December 3, 2020

The first Holidailies post of the year of our oh-my-lord 2020

 If it wasn't for the month of December, I wouldn't blog at all. But here we are again, so here we go! 

It's been a hell of year, which is both an obvious statement for every one of us who've lived through it, but also a personal truth. 

The year started with so much promise, too! We took our 10-year-old to San Francisco to see Hamilton for her birthday! So much fun! And we got to see friends! My wife and I went to Disney in February and ran a half marathon, checking off a bucket list item for her 40th birthday! So much fun! And I was several months into a new career! Everything was going so well!

And then... things happened. Before we'd really grasped the coronavirus, we had to wrestle with the realization that my mother appeared to be in the early stages of dementia and could no longer live on her own. After an abortive attempt to move her into assisted living near us, she moved in with us in March, just as the lockdown started, just as schools closed and my wife and I both started working from home. 

On one level, this was all a fantastic coincidence, because it meant that we could look after Mom while still working, and it meant that she wasn't moving into a place that could put her in more danger of contracting covid-19. But on the other hand, there are reasons that we Americans have mostly moved on from intergenerational housing, and we explored several of them over the course of 8 or 9 months. It's hard! Even harder when one generation is suffering from dementia and mostly in denial about it! 

As our girls returned to school (stressful and worrying in its own way), we finally made arrangements that Mom was comfortable with to move her into assisted living back in my hometown. That was hard too, though, because first she had to quarantine for two weeks in her new apartment (hard!) and just a few days after she finished her quarantine, a staff member tested positive, so everyone had to lock down again.  Still, I can tell it's going to be a good situation for her. 

Thanksgiving was... different. Just our immediate family, plus some Zoom time with the extended family. 

In a year that's been so different from past years, so different from what was expected or hoped for, I'm hopeful that regular blogging for Holidailies will be a bit of normalcy. I can't remember exactly when I started or how long I've been doing this, but I feel like it's somewhere in the range of 15+ years. I love connecting with other bloggers and working on making some little bit of writing a daily practice.

So here goes! Happy holidailies to you! 


  1. Happy Holidailies and welcome back! Sorry to hear about your Mom. Hope she is adjusting to her new living arrangement.

  2. Dementia is so hard. My mother in law (who is also in denial about her cognitive decline) was acting out so much in her assisted living place that the facility authorized my sister in law as an essential worker so she can go visit twice a week and help manage her.